At the End of Everything #3

A guy….

No. Too unimaginative. A boring way to start the introduction. Maybe I should put in something that portrays that I’m not that too eager to show off. That I am just like everyone else. To seem normal. After all, I am normal right?

Just an ordinary guy…

Urgh. No too. The whole point of this thing is to stand out, not to be ordinary. I need something that makes me unique. My brain struggled to come up with something funny. Nothing. All my thoughts were of how pointless all these seemed.

It was the second day that I am using the dating app, and Lucas told me that as a guy, what you write in your profile description has to be an eye catcher. Looks were important, he said, but no girls would like an empty or a half filled profile. I agreed with Lucas, because the both of us had this idea that girls are attracted to more than looks. At least the good girls are. So there I was, sitting in my room for the past half an hour, trying to describe myself in the best way possible.

The sheer effort of it reminded me of the time when I first wrote my resume. I diverted my attention back to the screen and my fingers went back to work on the keyboard.

A witty guy who enjoys making friends laugh…

Surely that was a good sentence. Everybody loves a person with a good sense of humour. At least that was what I saw from most girls’ profiles out there. I thought about that for a while, before deciding that it was probably not a good idea. I hit backspace key and returned to an empty textbox. Trying to sell yourself off as something would just introduce an expectation that you will need to fill later. Besides self-praise, especially online, comes of a narcissistic. I felt as if I was bragging. And I hated bragging.

A few more minutes passed without me being able to churn out any words, so I decided to take a break. I opened my door and walked out to the living room, hoping to talk to my housemates. There was no one at home. The house was empty, with only my roommate’s pet cat, Meowy, to greet me. Right. It was a Friday night, and most of them would be out with either friends or colleagues. Meowy stared at me disinterestedly, probably wondering why I am the only human left in the house.

“That’s right, Meowy, I am a lonely guy with no life.” Not to mention that I was also talking to a cat.

I walked back into my room, and sat dejectedly back on my chair. Friday nights used not to be like this, I thought, as a pang of loneliness began to set in. It was always spent with her, every Friday without fail, since I started working. We would watch movies, go out for dinners, take a walk at the park or just snuggle up together. It was our ritual. I missed her. I wondered if she was thinking the same too. Mostly probably not. She was most likely with him, the new guy in her life. I let out a sigh.

Why all the self-pity, I could almost hear Lucas saying. Yes, why indeed. I had promised myself that I would start meeting new people, to move on in life, and yet here I was, beating myself up again. This has got to stop, I tell myself. No matter how much I whine, life is not going to change for the better. The onus is up to me to improve. My fingers went to the keyboard, and slowly I began to type.

“I am guy who believes in second chances, that we all make mistakes in our life. I am on this website precisely because of that. That life deserves a second chance. I am here to meet new people, to see what life has to offer. Life to me is like a mysterious but wondrous journey, where you will never know what awaits you. Loves a lot of things in life, from the small stuff like a good ol’ iced coffee to the bigger stuff like the beautiful places on Earth.”

I read and re-read the entire thing and decided that one paragraph would be enough for the time being. Next I moved on to the subsequent sections, filling up my interests, typical Friday night and whom do I want to meet. I answered the match questions, about a hundred of them in one sitting. The questions were intended as a sort of personality filter, where you get to see how similar you are to others. At the end of it, I looked at my profile. satisfied that I had at least done something rather than mope around all night. Following Lucas’s earlier idea, I even set up a TInder account.

Let the game begin.


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