Someone recently told me that I'm not putting enough "effort" into my "looks". The said person goes on to say that I should wear more contact lenses to look "better".


To be honest, I do admit that I may not be the handsome guy that you would normally see on posters or televisions. And I do admit that I do not put as much priority to looks as do other guys do. I wear glasses, for one, instead of contact lenses and I seldom comb my hair or style my hair. I prefer to dress comfortably more than fashionably. But it's not to the extent that I completely forsake how I look. I still shave and use facial products.

There's a period of time when I used to care a lot about my looks. I would spend at least half an hour everyday styling my hair and forcing my mum to buy the clothes that were in trend so that I would look good. I also had facial products that cost over 200 dollars during that time and if contact lenses were readily available then, I guess I would have spend a lot on that too.

But then came a time where I realized that all this concern about how I look, the time and energy and money that I spend to make myself look good is nothing but a waste of time. Sure, good looks make a great first impression but it's not the only thing that sustains that impression. And it's definitely not the most important thing of all in life.

You see, out of every aspect of human characteristics there is, looks is the often one of the first thing to go. No matter how hard you try to keep it, when you reach around 40 or 50, there will be changes to how you look, whether you like it or not. Wrinkles, big belly and greying hair are among the few changes that no matter how hard you try to avoid or fix, will sooner or later be a part of your body. The point is, physical beauty would not last. It's temporary. It's fleeting. And you definitely cannot carry it to your grave.

For me, what matters more is what's inside the person itself. Or the inner beauty, as some would say. Our values, our beliefs, our attitudes and our behavior. Because by the end of the day, it is those that matters. No matter how handsome or pretty you are, the most you can do is give off good first impressions. If you are nothing but a snobbish, selfish person, you wouldn't have many friends either, people would even hate you despite all the good looks.

From what I observe, most of the time, good looking people aren't always the kindest. And the best people that you'll meet in life aren't always the most good looking. If I were to ask you what are the important characteristics of the people that had an profound impact on your life, say your teacher or your best friend, good looks is not gonna be on the top of the list often. Because what matters at the very end, what we treasure about the people who are important to us has nothing to do with whether they look like Angelina Jolie or not. Rather, it's their kindness, love and attitude that matters.

What I'm trying to say is that looks is not the most important thing that we should care about because there's so much more other worthy things that we could invest our energy and time in. Of course, that doesn't mean that you should forsake your looks altogether. On my opinion, as long as you look presentable and do not scare the hell out of small children, it's okay. Moderation is the key. Because deriving your sense of self esteem solely based on how you look is nothing but a false sense of security. Like I said, looks don't last. But your values, beliefs and attitudes do. Instead of spending half an hour everyday just to style your hair, why not focus on making yourself a better person instead?


  1. For male, priority might not be 'Looks' but CASH! Money does matter. For time being your concern should be your studies. Without good looks on our face do remember must be NEAT & TIDY.
    For female, they prefer not handsome husband over starving.HANDSOME can't buy you food!


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