Sunday, July 1, 2007

What is the measure of a true friend?

"Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and you will cry alone."

Proverbs, ah, never a better way to sometimes summarise your stormy feelings deep down inside.

Friends, how many of us can really find true friends that would really cry by your side during hardships and trials?
Very few indeed.

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Often in life, the path we walk in life will always criss-crossed with other people's and those whom path we crossed will sometimes become our friend.

But the fact is, most of the time very few will become our true friends and the ones we treat as true friends do not treat us the same in return.


Whom do we consider as true friends when touching on this topic?
Most of the time, we would look for friends matching our requirements such as being popular, know sense of humour, the list goes on.

Sometimes, without realising, we put ourselves above our friends, considering ourselves too good for them and treating them as if they were from a lower social class.
And in this situation, we would look down on them and eventually becoming selfish and like to show off in front of them.


But do you know that the instant we put ourselves above our friends, the relationship would not be called friendship anymore, it would better be off as nothing.

What does friendship mean? It means that everyone is equal and no one is above another, even though one might be more successful in life compared to the other one or others.
When we start thinking that we are superior than our friends in life, our friends would not look at us in awe but in fact in disgust.

Why?
Imagine, someone who you treat as friend, keeps of showing off in front of you, maybe in money or girlfriend/boyfriend, how would you feel?
Inferior right somettimes? And sometimes downright annoying.
Yea you got a gf, so what?
Especially if your friends do that on purpose we would often feel that they do not respect us.


Today in church i attended a class about this, so i choose to write to about this.

In the class we were shown a picture, a guy in cactus costume chasing after someone shouting, "I want to to be my friend!"
The girl in the picture kept running and did not care about that guy.

My teacher explained the picture, the girl was running because if dat guy hugged the girl, wouldn't she be hurt?
The same goes for life.

Often we would want someone to be our friends but the other someone does not seem to think the same. Because when our attitude got a lot of thorns, how do you expect someone to aceept us when they will get hurt?


So when next time you feel like nobody is liking you, try reaccessing youself.
Are your attitude filled with thorns? Or are you treating the relation wrongly? Treating your "friends" as they were from a lower class people and looking down on them?

Friendship means unconditional acceptance, accepting someone without caring how and what the person is, and after that, treating them equally without looking down on them.
An Indian saying goes, if you to accept someone or to be someone's friend, first you must put yourself in their shoe.

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